Often, people don’t want advice. They want to vent, to be heard, to explore how they think and feel, and to connect; to not feel so alone.
When someone tells me about a problem they’re having and I give advice, it shuts down all those objectives. I seem like a know-it-all (who doesn’t actually know it all). And the other person feels distanced from me—more alone than ever.
So why do I do it? Because I’m…